Twenty five years ago my life fell apart, like a glass bulb hitting a concrete floor it shattered into many pieces. I had filed for divorce after 10 years of marriage. I was a single mom with two toddlers and I quit my 8-to-5 job. Everything was new. My life choices were right for me, however the consequences were a little unsettling and daunting. I now had to rebuild my life, better than it had been going.
During this time I came across Barbara Sher’s concept of “Wishcraft“. She described a process that started with looking at your life and clarifying your style – what brings out the best in you. Society had defined me. I like to follow rules, so when I was encouraged to color within the lines – I colored within the lines. Parents, teachers and peers helped to create my neatly defined box of what my life should be. After 30 years that box didn’t work for me anymore. Wishcraft provided exercises to tap into my imagination to discover what I needed to be my best self.
First I had to let go of my fear and bring down the barriers to allow my imagination to flow again. From my past experiences I started identifying my touchstones. Touchstones are elements of life that bring out your strengths and joys. These things give you energy and applied with purpose will help reach your goals. Touchstones consist of activities, environments and people that inspire you to be your best self. By knowing what gives you joy it is easier to bring more of it into your life.
In this process I discovered that I liked learning, that I need challenges to work on. I like to teach. I love organizing and designing systems that improve the situation. I love applying my knowledge of accounting and tax in creative ways. I love strong vibrant colors and being one with nature. I like to feel appreciated. I need a balance of alone time and working with people. This knowledge provided the elements to build my ideal day.
Once crafted I had my vision and I made progress in the direction every day. I had just started an accounting business and was building it hour by hour. By including my touchstones in my ideal day I could craft a business and personal life that would inspire me. I identified what skills I needed to develop, what type of environment I work best in and what type of people to surround myself with.
Choosing to become a small business owner you are responsible for every hour of every day. You build your business hour by hour, day by day. This basically amounts to a lot of choices such as when I start to work, when I quit and what to do in between those times. Wishcraft helped me define that day to fit my unique touchstones.
Today, twenty five years later, this process laid the foundation to what I live by today – both career and personal. The process worked for me. Recently I bought an updated copy of the book, Wishcraft and I am going through the exercises, again. I can’t wait to see how my ideal day has changed and the unbelievable results I will achieve.
Mary Guldan-Lindstrom
